SitRep Feline squad Commander Ruckus reporting:
Dear Kitty Diary,
I am sure General Human is making preparations to award me the Feline Medal of Honor. I have proven myself in battle to be a fierce and skillful warrior. For days we have been afflicted with a cunning foe. It is quick and agile, capable of rapidly ascending from the floor to the ceiling and back again while flitting seductively in circles on the ground. I have been unable to communicate with this enemy and have been denied victory many times. I have named this vile aggressor as the Red Dot Squadron.
Many times I have been eluded by this skilled and elusive red dot as my paws quickly and masterfully attempted to capture it only to find it just beyond my reach. Private Belle often joins me in our frustrating endeavors. She has astounding speed and skill in leaping the walls to great heights yet, she sadly lacks the stamina that I possess. The silly girl seems to treat these acts of aggression as some sort of game. She does not understand we have been invaded.
Lt. Lucy stays back and guards our six. She rarely engages in the skirmishes that frequent our kitchen domain. She did however, inflict a few vicious blows by biting the red dot when it ventured too close to her paw, however the Lt. will not give chase. (I suspect she may be a bit of a coward.)
I finally discovered the tactic that led to the demise of the red dot. Wait until it begins to tire than ………. sit on it. Yes I just plopped my butt right down on top of that nuisance and it disappeared never to be seen again. I may have lost some battles but I won the war!
In anticipation of the medal ceremony I have thoroughly cleaned my fur, spit shined my paws, meticulously scoured my ears and forehead, and carefully cleaned my weapon of choice, (my butt) in anticipation of General Humans commendations and rewards.
Now all I have to ….. Oh My Word…. Prvt. Belle….. Lt. Lucy….. Come quickly we have another red dot! They have sent support troops our way!
SIT ON IT PRIVATE BELLE! SIT ON IT!
DARN IT WOMAN, JUST SIT ON IT!…..
Signed Commander Ruckus