Dear Kitty Diary #2

1.000Dear Kitty Diary,

I do so love my children but, they may not be the brightest kittens I’m sad to say. I have tried repeatedly to explain them the facts about the little red dot. I don’t know how many times I’ve enlightened them as to the mystical nature of the red dot and that it simply cannot be captured. It is too elusive of a prey for them to waste their energy on. After all, if I can’t catch it… Let’s just say it’s not possible!

I have a theory about the red dot. I believe it must exude some hallucinogenic gas that slows our reflexes and dulls our wits. It must affect the humans as well because every time the red dot appears the humans begin laughing and filming us with their phones. Pshhh! Lil’Bit’s a grown feline yet he’ll jump 5 ft. in the air trying to catch that darn dot as it skitters up the wall. Ugh! Does he catch it? Nooooooo! Both kittens leap in the air, run over, under or through anything in their way in the vain attempt to catch the stupid thing.

When the children are around I don’t bother trying to catch it. I just mew at them in a condescending tone reminding them they are wasting their time. They ignore me completely. When they’re asleep though, I admit, I do try to capture that mysterious pain in my paw. Ok, lets be honest here Diary, I don’t understand why I can’t catch it. I have had it under my paw thousands of times only to lift my paw and find it gone! Where? Where does it go? Ugh! It drives me crazy!

I have tried to warn my babies about how futile it is. How heart breaking it is to know that there is prey beyond my skill to catch. But they do not listen. They are convinced they will one day capture the red dot and prove they are worthy. Sigh. I suppose some lessons must be learned the hard way Dear Diary. But, it wouldn’t be quite so humiliating if my humans weren’t so bent on filming the disgraceful performance. They just laugh while we do all the work! They don’t even try to catch the stupid thing.

Lazy humans!

Well, good night Diary,


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