Dear Doggy Diary,
Today I had soooo much fun. My master took me fishing. You know what? There are fish that mated with CATS! Can you believe something so gross? Don’t look much like a cat but the human kept calling it a cat fish. It did smell almost as bad as cats do though so maybe it is one?
Anyway, while my master was busy sitting, (By the way humans don’t get treats for sitting, poor guy!) I was chasing ducks that swam in the pond. Every time those suckers dared come on land I’d chase ‘em right back in the water! I protected my master good! The geese kinda scared me though. Man, those things are vicious! One grabbed my tail and I thought I was a goner, but my master threw a worm at it and it let go. They sure are loud suckers. Put my barkin’ to shame let me tell ya.
My master finally got a little upset with all the noise we were making and decided to call it quits. Too bad! I wanted to see if he could catch a calico fish like Belle. Well we finally got home and I was tuckered out. Plopped right down on my master’s slippers and passed out cold. That is until the kittens decided I was their new toy.
So, I chased them just like I chased those ducks. Trapped one on the shelf, and started lickin’ on the other one when the sneaky little mongrel jumped down from the shelf and nailed me with her claws! It ain’t easy being a dog in a house full of cats! My master rescued me though and held me on her lap and pet me until I stopped crying. I love my humans! I just wanna lick and lick and lick their faces all day long!
Well gotta go. My master seem pretty insistent that I stop pooping in the house. The cats can though. Life ain’t always fair for us dogs!