Pain

Have you ever noticed that when you are really, really hungry food tastes so much better?  I don’t mean the kind of hunger you feel when you’ve skipped lunch, I mean the hunger you might feel after missing the ability to eat for quite a while. Or perhaps only having something like ramen noodles for days then suddenly being given a home cooked meal.  It just tastes phenomenal!

Pain is like that.  When living with pain on a daily basis  it can become relentless at times.  I’m used to pain.  I have a medical condition that means pain is never far from my mind.  There is a magnificent upside to pain like this though.  I am rarely complacent. Any day without pain is a gift that is cherished beyond measure.

Tonight I had an episode that was very painful and unfortunately was witnessed by several people unaware of how severe my pain can get.  Try to imagine a charley horse in your back.  It will cause the muscles in your back to clench in a knot so tight that it restricts the nerves to both legs leaving you unable to walk.  The restriction of the nerves gives you the sensation of an electrical shock that continues constantly until the muscle finally relaxes and allows the synapsis to fire normally once more, leaving you weak and shaking.  That is a common occurrence for me.

I am very aware of when I am at risk for one of these attacks and typically avoid going out in public.  Tonight it couldn’t be avoided however.  To be honest, I would not have given up going out this evening.  I made a choice to risk an attack or enjoy my life.  I chose to spend time with friends and do not regret that choice one bit!  The pain will pass.  It always does.  But, for the short time when the pain is absent it is like enjoying the feast after a long and tiresome fast.  Everything tastes phenomenal!

Tonight I did endure a painful few hours, but more importantly I shared a few hours with stimulating and interesting conversation with a couple of people that are very special to me.   A very welcome trade in my book.  I have a great advantage because of my physical condition.  It allows me the ability to cherish times that others take for granted.  I think it is God’s way of giving me great joy.  Without the pain I doubt I would appreciate the good things in my life as much as I do.  It may sound strange I guess but I am grateful for the pain.

Thank you Lord for reminding me how precious life truly is!

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